Having A Choice, Say or Both😌: the sequel

"Keep practicing Jeff, keep practicing and you'd be good at it" I can recall my mother telling me whenever I failed to completely lace my sneakers. I'd often do it haphazardly in link to how I remembered her doing it for me prior to leaving for school 😂.

 Truly with practice, I got soo good at it that I didn't need her verification as to if I did it right or not before stepping out. Here the neuroscientist will tell you that neuroplasticity has occurred; also known as brain plasticity is the process where the brain modifies it's connections after the alteration of neural pathways and it's synapses. This happens when there has been an influence resulting from an environmental, behavioural or neural change. Basically your brain has been re-wired to accommodate what has been learnt.

 With even more practice, you minimize indecisiveness or rewire your brain if I should say till what you seek to assimilate, becomes embedded in your subconscious. This is the level you should aspire to achieve if you want to have a say over situations or occurrences in your life.
 Much like me as a child where I didn't have a say over how my laces were done, it was only after practicing that I elevated towards having a say. Nonetheless instead of shoe laces or something less momentous, use this analogy in synchonity with life choices. Choices that you've been reluctant towards taking because you know you can't live with the aftermath yet you're screaming within to take it. Your brain doesn't appreciate indecisiveness as it "takes orders from you".

The whole idea is to be as less indecisive as possible, accepting the fallout from having made wrong choices but not living to reenact them. To learn from each wrong choice you make to the point of when even being faced with two terrible choices, you'd be able to pick the less terrible amongst the two and live by it.  Do not misconstrue me but taking risks without indecisiveness is totally different from making hasty decisions. In the sense that, one makes you learn lessons while the other leaves you utterly disappointed with or without possible chance at coming back.

Afterall one should be comfortable being uncomfortable for life in this world is a great struggle.

Do check back later for new posts and don't forget to share😄. Have a blissful day❤

Having a Choice, Say or Both 😌

If you are not familiar with E40's song, choices then you'd probably be acquainted with that of Sarkodie's Hand to Mouth. In this piece of music the rapper talks about what he did or does with his earnings. From buying lands, putting up real estate which aggregates the basic idea of wisely investing and bagging of assets to knowing when to "treat yo' self". This of which he believes should be the calibre of thinking every growing adult should possess.

Its a choice to take up or do away with what he articulates but he advises that you do take it up so you get to treat yo' self when the time is right.

It's one thing to have a choice, another to have a say or even both when a situation or circumstance arises. Whichever you're faced with, I want you to cognize that there lies a clear line of distinction which when identified, helps to make you connect the dots easily as some seem to have done with their lives.

You should fathom that it all starts from somewhere, in this case the first level which'd be being limited to having choices. We're faced with having to make choices at every single second and or turn in our lives. From choosing what pattern to observe when we wake up in the morning to even how we'd want to have a delicacy done so that we can attain that happiness from having achieved a desireable taste.

Our choices are often made consciously or with nescience and will most definitely have consequential or inadvertent repercussions. James Van Praagh said and I quote,

"I believe life is just a series of decisions we make, and depending on our choice, must live with the result of that decision". 

If we for certain can't live with the aftermath of the choices we make as humans to live our lives, then we cannot live this life.

 Mr. van Praagh goes on to say that the choices we usually make consist of a multitude of possibilities and, whether real or imagined, we must recognize that in some way the decision will change our life forever.

" As a result of there being so many factors involved with our decision-making and with its unknown result, many of us hesitate to even make a choice, thinking it would be safer and that we’d be better off where we are instead of delving into the unknown. Just think of the number of events in history that would never have occurred if someone did not make the choice to do something different, unknown, unproved or un-experienced? How many relationships would never have been realized without making a particular choice?" ~ Choices in Life, James Van Praagh

I'd entreat you to ponder over this as we prepare to enjoy our weekend while destressing and recuperating for the week that awaits us. Take care of yourself and know that God loves you❤.


Do check back next week for the continuation of this post on Having a Choice, Say or both.

Positivity👌🏾

  It takes a lot of strength and in some cases self control in trying to see someone’s view point on the need to think positively after one has been at the behest of back-to-back impediments. At the onset it only fuels rage because you feel the person doesn't have the slightest of ideas as to how you’re feeling or even going through. 

   They may be deficient in the two factors which have led to you being clouded by your  thoughts but the words or advice they articulate are ones that offer a stretching arm of help through those dark clouds which hung over your head – but there’s a catch.

Being mentally positive isn’t like taking some sort of neurologically manipulative serum to induce a state of equilibrium in one’s neurochemistry thereby making you impervious to the emotional turmoil that’s associated with the aftermath of experiencing hindrances. 

It’s more of a process which you can start today.  To the best of my knowledge, there are no standard steps to take to achieve this but we can map out something for ourselves, tailor it to suit our needs so we become better if not passionate and or persistent.

Someone once said, “Thinking positively isn’t about expecting the best to happen every time but accepting that whatever happens is best for the moment”.   Truly if we can hold on tenaciously to this sort of mantra whenever we’re faced with setbacks, I can be very certain that we’d witness the rise in a new breed of humans showing resilience in both the mental and attitude aspect..

Believe and make a conscious effort to tell yourself that no matter how bad it is or how bad it is going to get, you’re going to make it because greater is He that is in you than he that is of the world (1^st John 4:4)

Love❤️, a Feeling or Choice?

So I found this on Tumblr and goodness gracious did it shine some light of perspective unto the issue of love being either a feeling or choice. I can only hope that after reading this, you find much lucidity in this too.

“ - Is love a feeling or a choice?

We were all a bunch of teenagers and so naturally we said it was a feeling. She said if we clung to that belief, we’d never have a lasting relationship of any sort.

She made us interview a dozen adults who were or had been married and made us ask them why it lasted or failed. At the end I asked them if love was an emotion or a choice.

Everybody said it was a choice

It was a conscious commitment

It was something you choose to make every day with someone who has chosen the same thing. They all said that at one point in their marriage, the “feeling of love” had vanished or faded and they weren’t happy.  They said feelings are always changing and one cannot build something on such shaky foundation.

The married ones said when things were bad, they chose to open the communication, identifying what broke and how to fix it by recreating something worth falling in love with.

The divorced ones said they chose to walk away

Ever since that class, that project, I never looked at relationships the same way.

I understood why arranged marriages were successful; I discovered the differences in feelings and commitments.

I’ve never gone for the person who makes my heart flutter or my head spin. I’ve chosen the people who were committed to choosing me, dedicated towards finding something to adore even 

on the ugliest days

I no longer fear the day someone who swore I was their universe can no longer see the stars in my eyes as long as they choose to find them again”

Who is your friend? 🤔

 " I want you to take a moment and think of all the things that define your life, all the people you love, your job, your co-workers etc. Now imagine that in a flash, all of these were taken from you; will you just accept your new life and move on or fight for what you've lost?"

-Culled from Barry Allen, The Flash

  Someone once told me, "Your life actually starts when you meet the right people and at the right time. It may be quite hard to tell whom the right people are and when the right time is. At the onset, you find yourself doing things for them which you'd logically not do. But just because they fill a certain void in you, you subconsciously accept them as the right people". Based on personal experiences, I've realized that when one is engulfed with the right people, it induces an inexplicable happiness and not that kind of happiness which results from happenings. One which lasts long enough to keep you afloat till the silver lining in that cloud is discovered.

  In recent times the word or title "friend", whichever way you'd want to call it is thrown about easily. Making us prey to being hurt and extremely vulnerable or one could see it as learning curve where an invaluable lesson is learnt. One which can warp and or change our entire perspective of whom a friend is to us. Nevertheless, we shouldn't allow such lessons to harden our hearts but be receptive towards being informed.

It took me long enough for the dawn of realization to hit me pertaining the identity of whom a friend is or even more a defining moment as to if the person is a friend or someone you just know. Mind you the two are not the same and as such, I ask you today, do you know who your legit friends are?

The answer to this question is imperative to your well being, answer wisely. Enjoy your day!

Reboot 🍃

*long pause*

I've had this coming for a long time and it is about time I got right to it. I just didn't know when it was going to be but then I guess, when you've had once maybe too many epiphanies, one ought to pay attention. Unless you're too broke to do that😂.

So a reboot..  basically, I've always wanted to cause a positive stir with what I do and or write. The daunting factor of what exactly to write about is that which has left me pondering enough to realize that Theodore Roosevelt of blessed memory was absolutely right when he advised and I quote, "Do what you can, with what you have, where you are" .

I'd ascribe this reinvigorated series of posts to come to Teddy's quote I aforementioned. Thanks Ted!

I sincerely hope you'd find them well inspiring, informed .. *runs out of adjectives* urm you know the rest. Enjoy your day! 👌